Youth and Porn Resource KitHow do I respond to a young person who’s felt ‘uncomfortable’ with porn?
Feeling uncomfortable about something seen in porn is a very common experience amongst young people in Aotearoa. This can relate to multiple factors, including:
- Discomfort or distress while watching violent or extreme sexual content.
- Shame associated with watching and/or enjoying porn, particularly amongst youth from religious or cultural backgrounds where porn is taboo.
- The tension of being both disturbed and aroused by porn at the same time.
- Being triggered by sexually aggressive content, due to past sexual assault.
Normalising any (and all) responses to porn (arousal, fear, disgust, curiosity, etc.) is an important first step when engaging with a young person as it validates their experience. Helping the young person process the feeling is important and should be accompanied by open and curious questioning to better understand the unique experience and characteristics of the young person.
Any porn-related harm (such as feeling triggered due to past sexual assault) should be identified, and the young person directed to appropriate support if needed.
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“It (porn) also makes me feel really uncomfortable. Like how do you come to terms with watching something that arouses you, but you’re not actually sure if it’s allowed to arouse you? Do you admit that to someone? And it’s just this awkward in between.”
Female, 26 years