Youth and Porn Resource KitCase Study 4.
Daniel: ‘Porn language and references at school’
Daniel (14 yrs) has been referred to the school counsellor following increasingly sexualised language and behaviours, including calling fellow female classmates derogatory sexual terms, joking about rape porn, and watching porn on his laptop during break.
1: Validate and normalise
Without justifying harmful sexual attitudes and behaviours, discuss with Daniel how porn is created for adults and has some problematic messages. When young people watch it, they can adopt some language, attitudes, and behaviours that in real-life can be harmful or prevent them from having healthy, respectful relationships.
2: Assess
Assess degree of harm and risk to self or others. Use questions such as:
- How are you feeling about your porn habits?
- How frequently (and for how long) are you watching porn?
- What type of content do you find yourself watching?
- How does what you are watching impact your real-life sex or fantasies?
- Have you wanted to try anything you have seen in porn?
Note: It’s important to respond without judgement, use sensitive questioning, and affirm Daniel for being open if he discloses any problematic porn usage. Assess for other possibilities. For instance, Daniel may have been shown or forced to watch porn, or he may have had unwanted sexual experiences, which could be the triggers for his behaviour.
3: Build critical thinking and porn literacy
Discuss how watching a lot of porn can normalise and shape sexual attitudes and behaviours that can be harmful in real life. For example, in porn it looks like women enjoy verbal or physical aggression, but in real life most women do not enjoy this. Use open questions to stimulate critical thinking.
For example:
- How do you feel about what you see in porn (in terms of violence, racism, sexism, etc.) and how does that sit with your own personal/family/cultural views?
- What do you think about others learning about sex from porn?
- Do your current sexual attitudes and behaviours reflect who you want to be?
- What do healthy sexual relationships look like for you and how can you get there?
Note: Acknowledge that if Daniel has not had real-life sexual experiences, he might not know the answer to some of these questions.
4: Support and refer
Support and guidance should be provided to minimise harm to self and others. This may include self-directed tools for cutting down on porn usage, such as In The Know, online youth APPS, and/or referral to counsellors or to specialist services.
Previous
